An ordinary $5 machete.  Cheap plastic handle, cheap cloth scabbard.  Poorly ground blade.

It all started when I said to myself that the handle was awful, and I bet I could make a better one out of scrap wood and duct tape.

Hey, instead of scrap wood, how about a tropical hardwood like cocobolo?  Oh, and it could use a hand guard, you know, like pirate swords have?

Yeah, that’ll do the trick.  And grind down the blade a bit.  Not too pretty, but at least give it a sharp edge and sand down the rough spots.

And make sure it’s heat treated!  Fire that thing up, and temper the edge.

And it needs a scabbard.  Leather.  Sewn up with copper wire.

Now that’s a beauty!

A steel pommel can bash the skulls of sea monsters, zombies and orcs alike.

Handle makes a great grip.

Please note that I am not addressing why you should make your machete into a pirate sword.  Such a topic would be beyond the scope of this essay.

Anyway, it’s perfectly obvious that pirate swords are awesome!

And of course, it still functions perfectly well as a machete.

Yarr!